In a world obsessed with physical appearance, it’s no surprise that many women feel discontent with their bodies. The constant barrage of messages telling us that we’re not good enough can be overwhelming. The pressure to look perfect is fueled by social media influencers and glossy magazines, constantly selling us the idea that we need to change ourselves to be better. But here’s the truth: being thinner won’t make you happier. Let’s dive into this topic and explore why your self-worth is not determined by the number on the weighing scales.
The Reality Behind the Media
The women we see in the media, whom we often compare ourselves to, are often not women at all—they are vulnerable teenagers. These young girls are sold the dream of fame and fortune through modeling, but the reality of their working lives is far from glamorous. The toxic environment of the modeling industry is something I couldn’t stand by and watch, which is why I chose psychology over pursuing a career in model photography.
The Curse of Perfection
Comparing ourselves to the beautiful models we see can lead to feelings of inadequacy. I personally struggled with thoughts of not being enough—thin enough, pretty enough, tall enough, perfect enough. As a young person dealing with acne, photographing models with flawless skin only intensified those feelings. Retouching can create an illusion of perfection, but it’s an expensive and time-consuming process. The modeling industry is plagued with ageism, eating disorders, and relentless pressure to be flawless. Is that really what we want to compare ourselves to or encourage our loved ones, our daughters, to compare themselves with?
Perception of Beauty and Self-Acceptance
Have you ever looked back at pictures of yourself when you were younger or a different size and realized that you now think that you were beautiful then, but didn’t realise it at the time? This is the curse of living under the pressure of perfection—a constant desire to improve, and a failure to recognise our beauty in the present moment. Our perception of beauty is not tied to our size but rather to our internal state. Otherwise, we would have felt happier with ourselves in the past than we do now – being older now.
Insights from Body Perception Studies
Various studies shed light on body perception and its impact on happiness. One study explored how a reduced-calorie diet affected male soldiers during training. The results showed that such dieting led to disordered thinking about their bodies and a fear of weight gain. Simply put, restricting calorie intake doesn’t make us love our bodies more—it often leads to preoccupation with our shape and appearance. Another study revealed that women had difficulty identifying their own bodies among a lineup of different sizes, where the face was missing. This suggests that our perception of how our bodies look can be unreliable – you can’t trust your own perception of how big your body is.
The Sad Step and Challenging Toxic Pressures
The weighing scales, also known as the “sad step,” hold no power over your self-worth. Your weight doesn’t define your value or your deserving of a place in the world. The numbers on the scale fluctuate due to various factors, including natural body fluctuations and even the content of our digestive system. The idea that what you weigh determines your worth is a fallacy. Remember, you can be loved by someone at any weight—the most important person to find love from is yourself.
Developing Self-Compassion
It’s essential to recognize that the pressure to look a certain way is not your fault. Modern society places unrealistic expectations on our appearance, making it understandable that we worry about how we look. However, it’s time to develop compassion for ourselves. All humans are beautiful, and your unique body serves many functions and keeps you safe in numerous ways. Attacking ourselves psychologically only harms our overall well-being.
Remember, you are inherently beautiful just as you are, and your weight does not define your value. So challenge the status quo, embrace your uniqueness, and let compassion guide your journey towards a healthier and happier relationship with yourself.
